When I returned from maternity leave, I worked part-time for one month. A combination of days off and work from home days made the transition back to work a bit easier, more gradual. Working part-time also gave me a glimpse into the possibility that I could manage most of my job and get to spend more time with my kids! So I approached my boss about working four day a week on a permanent basis. To my surprise, the change took a lot less convincing than I thought it would.
So now I am working my normal 8:30am-5:30pm schedule on Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Friday (and bringing home 80% of my previous salary). And I'm spending Wednesdays with my kids!
Today is my first Wednesday at home. Only time will tell how the shift at work will go, and to be honest, the change has me anxious and feeling a bit more stressed than usual. But I know for sure that I am looking forward to spending more time with Buddy and Kat. I am excited to get to do a few of the activities that I've enviously heard stay-at-home moms talking about - story time at the library, mid-week trips to the zoo, art projects that take more time than I had on busy weekends.
More on this change soon, but for now, I'm going to go enjoy it!
Showing posts with label Balancing Act. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Balancing Act. Show all posts
Wednesday, February 6, 2013
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
Shopping Success
I have a big fancy work party next weekend and need a new dress. Kat needs new shoes. So I decided to be daring and conquer both tasks with a single mall trip.
Sure - this might not sound daring to you... but unlike many women, shopping is not one of my hobbies. I try to avoid the mall if at all possible. And usually, finding a dress is about as challenging as establishing a colony on the moon. For this occasion, my ideal dress allows me to wear a full-support bra (thank you breastfeeding), isn't too clingy (giant mommy pooch), is modest enough to wear around colleagues but still flattering, and maybe a color other than black. And if that wasn't enough, since I was going to get Kat new shoes, she would have to come with me.
I prepared for this adventure by planning a crock-pot dinner (Chicken Curry) and throwing it all together to start cooking at lunch time. Since dinner was hands-off, I wouldn't have to worry about rushing home. And I decided that leaving just after her nap would give me optimal Kat cooperativeness. During naptime, I pumped so that NerdDad would have milk to feed Buddy while I was gone. And just before we left, I snuck a pack of fruit snacks into my purse.
The store where we got Kat's last pair of shoes no longer carries her size (what's up with that?!). She has wide feet, so the pickings were pretty slim already. Since find a dress had a more concrete deadline, we moved on to that. And somehow we made it past the kid play area with minimal whining. Score!
When we get into the first department store, Kat announced that she had had enough of the stroller and wanted to "walk myself". So we played "Follow Mommy", which surprisingly worked perfectly! She very obediently followed me around while I browsed each rack and picked out four dresses to try on.
And now here is the most amazing part of this story... The first wasn't bad, but a little too casual for this party. And the second was AMAZING! In fact, it was so amazing, that I didn't even both trying on the other two dresses! The dress met all of my criteria AND it was only $60! Thank you shopping gods! Check back after this weekend; I'll post pics.
P.S. The rest of the trip was a success too: Kat got new shoes and sunglasses, Buddy was napping when we got home, and dinner was ready!
Sure - this might not sound daring to you... but unlike many women, shopping is not one of my hobbies. I try to avoid the mall if at all possible. And usually, finding a dress is about as challenging as establishing a colony on the moon. For this occasion, my ideal dress allows me to wear a full-support bra (thank you breastfeeding), isn't too clingy (giant mommy pooch), is modest enough to wear around colleagues but still flattering, and maybe a color other than black. And if that wasn't enough, since I was going to get Kat new shoes, she would have to come with me.
I prepared for this adventure by planning a crock-pot dinner (Chicken Curry) and throwing it all together to start cooking at lunch time. Since dinner was hands-off, I wouldn't have to worry about rushing home. And I decided that leaving just after her nap would give me optimal Kat cooperativeness. During naptime, I pumped so that NerdDad would have milk to feed Buddy while I was gone. And just before we left, I snuck a pack of fruit snacks into my purse.
The store where we got Kat's last pair of shoes no longer carries her size (what's up with that?!). She has wide feet, so the pickings were pretty slim already. Since find a dress had a more concrete deadline, we moved on to that. And somehow we made it past the kid play area with minimal whining. Score!
When we get into the first department store, Kat announced that she had had enough of the stroller and wanted to "walk myself". So we played "Follow Mommy", which surprisingly worked perfectly! She very obediently followed me around while I browsed each rack and picked out four dresses to try on.
And now here is the most amazing part of this story... The first wasn't bad, but a little too casual for this party. And the second was AMAZING! In fact, it was so amazing, that I didn't even both trying on the other two dresses! The dress met all of my criteria AND it was only $60! Thank you shopping gods! Check back after this weekend; I'll post pics.
P.S. The rest of the trip was a success too: Kat got new shoes and sunglasses, Buddy was napping when we got home, and dinner was ready!
Sunday, January 27, 2013
I'm baa-aack!
After a month-long hiatus, I'm back! It turns out that working a full-time job and being present (mentally and physically) for all the mommy/wifey stuff doesn't leave a whole lotta time to write a blog. Who would've guessed!?!
Actually, I did guess. Especially not enough time for the type of blog that I thought I was trying to write. You know the kind - the ones with all the pretty pictures of food and crafts. The kind that get pinned on Pinterest. The ones with step-by-step photos and 14 pictures of the same cookie. Now, don't get me wrong! I love reading that kind of blog. I frequently use them for inspiration and ideas. But, this is not ever going to be that kind of blog...
For starters, I don't have that kind of time. If I spent as much time as needed taking pictures of cookies and posting about baking cookies, then I probably wouldn't have time to ACTUALLY bake the cookies.
And after reading this totally down-to-earth post from Okay BA! and thinking about it for about a week, I realized that a pretty blog is actually the opposite of what I want my blog to be. (And the great thing about having a blog is I get to decide what I want my blog to be!) I want to share real life - balancing two kids and a husband and a job and all the fun stuff! And for me, real life doesn't include DSLR photos of my latest creation or the patience to explain every step of a recipe to folks in internetland. For me, real life includes photos taken on my iPhone and a messy house in the background. Real life means letting Kat help me cook and not having the time or energy to actually measure ingredients. Real life is mostly spent living, and documenting real life is secondary.
And realizing all this removes a lot of pressure. My goal isn't to gain hundreds of readers (but that would still be awesome). I just want to share what I'm doing. So expect more posts - honest, real life, messy posts.
Actually, I did guess. Especially not enough time for the type of blog that I thought I was trying to write. You know the kind - the ones with all the pretty pictures of food and crafts. The kind that get pinned on Pinterest. The ones with step-by-step photos and 14 pictures of the same cookie. Now, don't get me wrong! I love reading that kind of blog. I frequently use them for inspiration and ideas. But, this is not ever going to be that kind of blog...
For starters, I don't have that kind of time. If I spent as much time as needed taking pictures of cookies and posting about baking cookies, then I probably wouldn't have time to ACTUALLY bake the cookies.
And after reading this totally down-to-earth post from Okay BA! and thinking about it for about a week, I realized that a pretty blog is actually the opposite of what I want my blog to be. (And the great thing about having a blog is I get to decide what I want my blog to be!) I want to share real life - balancing two kids and a husband and a job and all the fun stuff! And for me, real life doesn't include DSLR photos of my latest creation or the patience to explain every step of a recipe to folks in internetland. For me, real life includes photos taken on my iPhone and a messy house in the background. Real life means letting Kat help me cook and not having the time or energy to actually measure ingredients. Real life is mostly spent living, and documenting real life is secondary.
And realizing all this removes a lot of pressure. My goal isn't to gain hundreds of readers (but that would still be awesome). I just want to share what I'm doing. So expect more posts - honest, real life, messy posts.
Sunday, December 9, 2012
Hi Ho Hi Ho! It's off to work I go!
Please excuse my absence as I have been settling back into my routine at work and trying to figure out my new life as working mom of TWO! And for added fun, this past week included: preparing for Christmas, an overnight visit of one of NerdDad's friends, one kid with pink eye, and both kids with ear infections... And you have one very crazy week!
Now that I'm back at work, my mother-in-law (MIL) watches Buddy and Kat twice a week. (And at the end of the month, Buddy will join Kat at daycare for the other three days.) Unfortunately, with Buddy's ear infection, he has been a lot fussier than usual (the sign that indicated an ear infection in the first place) and hasn't been napping well. I know that it's because his ear hurts, and I had lots of ear infections as a kid, so I understand his pain. But his fussiness really tests my patience. Fortunately, I am able to hand him off to NerdDad when I've had enough, but my poor MIL has been struggling while watching both kids on her own. Hopefully, the antibiotics will do their thing, and he'll be back to his old self again soon.
So far, the work-family balance hasn't been too hard, but I am also working from home half the week, at least until the end of December. So the back-to-work adjustment is spread out over the month. On one hand, adjusting to this new routine has been fairly easy, so spreading out the adjustment period has been nice. But on the other hand, I know that another new routine is just around the corner, and I almost just wish I could get it all over with at once. For now though, I'm trying to enjoy my workdays at home with my Buddy.
Yesterday, we started off the weekend with a little mid-morning Christmas shopping. NerdDad and I each took one kid and off we went. Thankfully the crowds weren't too heavy yet (probably because of the non-stop rain). Between just a couple of shopping trips and a decent amount of online shopping, we have made a decent dent in our Christmas lists already. Considering our usual procrastination, we're feeling pretty proud of ourselves!
Now that I'm back at work, my mother-in-law (MIL) watches Buddy and Kat twice a week. (And at the end of the month, Buddy will join Kat at daycare for the other three days.) Unfortunately, with Buddy's ear infection, he has been a lot fussier than usual (the sign that indicated an ear infection in the first place) and hasn't been napping well. I know that it's because his ear hurts, and I had lots of ear infections as a kid, so I understand his pain. But his fussiness really tests my patience. Fortunately, I am able to hand him off to NerdDad when I've had enough, but my poor MIL has been struggling while watching both kids on her own. Hopefully, the antibiotics will do their thing, and he'll be back to his old self again soon.
So far, the work-family balance hasn't been too hard, but I am also working from home half the week, at least until the end of December. So the back-to-work adjustment is spread out over the month. On one hand, adjusting to this new routine has been fairly easy, so spreading out the adjustment period has been nice. But on the other hand, I know that another new routine is just around the corner, and I almost just wish I could get it all over with at once. For now though, I'm trying to enjoy my workdays at home with my Buddy.
Yesterday, we started off the weekend with a little mid-morning Christmas shopping. NerdDad and I each took one kid and off we went. Thankfully the crowds weren't too heavy yet (probably because of the non-stop rain). Between just a couple of shopping trips and a decent amount of online shopping, we have made a decent dent in our Christmas lists already. Considering our usual procrastination, we're feeling pretty proud of ourselves!
After the busy week, I'm spending today getting into the Christmas spirit and recharging for the week ahead. I spent the morning sipping peppermint mocha coffee and listening to Christmas music while making cookies with Kat. It's been sooo nice! A big thank you to NerdDad for holding Buddy all morning so that I could bake. :) He'll be rewarded with lots of cookies!
Sunday, November 25, 2012
End of Maternity Leave
It's been a bit since my last post; the family and I went to visit my family and celebrate thanksgiving. My ten weeks of maternity leave is over on Monday, so I've been trying to enjoy my last week where my sole focus is family. As nearly every working mother will tell you, the end of maternity leave is an emotional milestone. When I was on my maternity leave with Kat, the weeks before I went back to work were filled with worries about starting daycare, finding a routine, pumping at work, and how in the world was I going to be able to leave her?! Since Buddy is my second child, I'm not (nearly) as worried about daycare or pumping. I know that I did it before and am confident that I'll manage again this time. But establishing a routine and finding time is an even bigger worry this time around.
Being on maternity leave has given me plenty of time to not only focus on Buddy, but to also spend extra time with Kat and to start a few projects (like this blog!). I know that as Buddy gets older, the evening rush between the time I walk in the door until I fall into bed will become less stressful. But I remember how frantic that time of the day was when I first went back after Kat was born. Taking care of just Kat and preparing for the next day was sometimes all that I could do. So how do I take care of Buddy, prepare for the next day, AND spend some quality time with Kat? And I might be totally insane, but I would so love to be able to find time to continue some of my fun projects. Oh, and let's not totally forget NerdDad!
Plus how in the world am I going to leave this grin?
Being on maternity leave has given me plenty of time to not only focus on Buddy, but to also spend extra time with Kat and to start a few projects (like this blog!). I know that as Buddy gets older, the evening rush between the time I walk in the door until I fall into bed will become less stressful. But I remember how frantic that time of the day was when I first went back after Kat was born. Taking care of just Kat and preparing for the next day was sometimes all that I could do. So how do I take care of Buddy, prepare for the next day, AND spend some quality time with Kat? And I might be totally insane, but I would so love to be able to find time to continue some of my fun projects. Oh, and let's not totally forget NerdDad!
Plus how in the world am I going to leave this grin?
So before I get entirely overwhelmed, I want to write a few reminders for myself:
- Take life one step at a time. Try not to become overwhelmed thinking about things that need to be done tomorrow, next week, etc.
- Enjoy the few free moments throughout the day. Use those few seconds to take a deep breath and relax.
- Be willing to let some things go.
- Ask for help when needed. (And if I don't, I shouldn't get mad at NerdDad for not being able to read my mind!)
- Be open to change. With a new person in the family, we may need to change responsibilities or routines. For example, moving dinner time a half hour later might make the whole evening less stressful.
Monday, November 5, 2012
Housekeeping Realization
A normal workday for me goes a little something like this: I wake up at 6:45 to breastfeed Buddy, dress both kids, shower and dress myself, and pray that I'll be out the door by 8:00. I need to be at work by 8:30, my mandatory hour lunch is spent either breastfeeding or pumping and maybe squeezing in an errand before I eat lunch at my desk. I leave the office at 5:30, arrive home 5:45-6:00 to immediately start working on dinner (or supervising the making of dinner while I breastfeed). By the time dinner is finished, it's close to 7:00. I get to spend about an hour with Kat before bedtime at 8:00. That leaves a mere two hours before I go to bed at 10:00.
When I went back to work after the birth of Kat and settled into this routine, it was a shock at how little time was left at the end of the day. And I realized that I could either spend that time relaxing, focused on activities that I wanted to do, and connecting with NerdDad OR I could spend time cleaning, doing dishes and laundry, and working on other chores.
This decision seriously stressed me out for a while. Obviously, spending those two hours in a way I enjoyed was my preference, but I just couldn't let those chores go undone. NerdDad is awesome, and we have chores pretty evenly divided, usually based on what we feel most passionate about. Keeping the house clean and organized fell on my plate. It takes NerdDad a few too many days before realizing that something is dirty. And I'm always concerned about what visitors might think if they arrive when I have dusty floors, fingerprinted windows, and cobwebs in the corners. However, spending my evenings straightening and cleaning just left me feeling drained, worn out, and on edge. Something had to give (or else I was going to fold).
Now, of course, there are some chores that just have to be done (dishes and clothes need to be washed and kitchen counters should be wiped down). But for a while, I let everything else go. And I felt horribly guilty!
Over time, though, I've realized something. The reason I felt bad about not cleaning as often as I "should" wasn't because I was bothered by the extra dust; it was because I was worried about others being bothered by my extra dust. And I realized that this was silly! My house is mine (and my family's)! I should be able to keep it however I want. My home should be a sanctuary, not a place where I'm worried about what others think. So I instituted a new rule: the only people who would be invited into my home would be ones that I was confident would not judging my housekeeping.
Perhaps my new rule seems silly, and that I just need to toughen up and not worry about what others think. But relieving myself of the need to impress visitors with my housekeeping skills has freed me to be able to spend more time on the things I love. And that's better for everybody.
When I went back to work after the birth of Kat and settled into this routine, it was a shock at how little time was left at the end of the day. And I realized that I could either spend that time relaxing, focused on activities that I wanted to do, and connecting with NerdDad OR I could spend time cleaning, doing dishes and laundry, and working on other chores.
This decision seriously stressed me out for a while. Obviously, spending those two hours in a way I enjoyed was my preference, but I just couldn't let those chores go undone. NerdDad is awesome, and we have chores pretty evenly divided, usually based on what we feel most passionate about. Keeping the house clean and organized fell on my plate. It takes NerdDad a few too many days before realizing that something is dirty. And I'm always concerned about what visitors might think if they arrive when I have dusty floors, fingerprinted windows, and cobwebs in the corners. However, spending my evenings straightening and cleaning just left me feeling drained, worn out, and on edge. Something had to give (or else I was going to fold).
Now, of course, there are some chores that just have to be done (dishes and clothes need to be washed and kitchen counters should be wiped down). But for a while, I let everything else go. And I felt horribly guilty!
Over time, though, I've realized something. The reason I felt bad about not cleaning as often as I "should" wasn't because I was bothered by the extra dust; it was because I was worried about others being bothered by my extra dust. And I realized that this was silly! My house is mine (and my family's)! I should be able to keep it however I want. My home should be a sanctuary, not a place where I'm worried about what others think. So I instituted a new rule: the only people who would be invited into my home would be ones that I was confident would not judging my housekeeping.
Perhaps my new rule seems silly, and that I just need to toughen up and not worry about what others think. But relieving myself of the need to impress visitors with my housekeeping skills has freed me to be able to spend more time on the things I love. And that's better for everybody.
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